USFL '86: Oakland, or, Shoot for 'Em All and Let God Sort it Out

Oakland's aggression the previous off-season sort of worked out: Damon Allen had the hot-and-cold rookie year typical of a genuine star; Ron Rivera proved an anchor in an already impressive linebacking core; Dokie Williams had 2,000+ all-purpose yards and looked like a veteran at his zenith; rookie Reggie Langhorne's future looked bright. The Invaders were 6-2-1 in the first half of the year; a shallow backfield--aging Tom Newton, Eric Jordan, and Louis Jackson--and ticky-tack injuries to Allen seemed to be the prime culprits for the 2-7 second-half collapse. Still, 8-9-1 got them to the playoffs. 

We didn't give Cletis Killdeer much credit last year, but the young man must be recognized as the architect of the turnaround. A "Kinetic Personnel Engagement Officer"--he both scouted and talked to players rather than reviewed scouting reports--Taube hired him near the end of a disastrous '84. Killdeer cut his teeth with the Raiders, serving as a "Shadow Personnel Specialist" alongside a fellow named Luther Nightingale. Cletis ping-ponged across North America, scouting and delivering reports to Al Davis and serving as a shield between the organization and the media. He established the Raiders so-called "spider network" of traditional scouts, custodians, hotdog vendors, Hertz rental car attendants, HoJo customer service workers, college chaplins, and "volunteer" JuCo coaches who kept track of the prospects and raw talent that helped deliver three Super Bowls over the late 70s and early 80s. 

When Davis--who always saw Killdeer as a pipsqueak--passed him over for promotion, he quit the club, grew his hair out, and donned an eyepatch a la Kurt Russell in Escape from LA. He was only 23 years old and recognized the family history of Killdeer men losing their hair at 26, so no time better than now. Every Raider found him odd, especially Dokie, but when he came with double the money in August '84, it was too good to pass up. 

Taube liked him because he seemed to have a preternatural ability at landing guys at a reasonable expense. Part of this was personal appeal to duty, but also guaranteeing contracts through the first year--a strategy also used by Chicago with some success. There was no "bullshit" element to an Oakland offer even if it lacked the flash of other clubs. The combination of the new TV money, a robust Shadow Market, and increasing revenue through ticket sales--they were fun enough in '85 to draw big crowds--led Killdeer to go off the reservation. 

He packed John Sullivan and Gary Plummer in a half-million package with San Diego, traded Marcus Quinn and traded for Mike Lush. He activated his old spider network in late July and brought in linebacker Greg Braclin and quarterback Mike Moroski, already a patsy: Bill Walsh signed the ex-Falcon, got weeks of intel on Atlanta, and promptly cut him. Cletis admired the double-cross; he nearly did the same when he signed Mike--always good to get dirt on an NFL team, especially a behemoth; Taube made Killdeer keep him, as they'd still be on the hook for $165,000.

He recruited a Hacker Club at Stanford to help him highjack a negotiation call between Neil Elshire and the Vikings, offering fifty percent more. When Rams coach John Robinson revealed to SI that Henry Ellard was holding out, Cletis sent an old flame--a former Raiders cheerleader--to meet the receiver at a night club in Brentwood with a 4-year, $1 million offer. When those Stanford nerds hacked the NFL's salary database, Killdeer learned Vince Newsome was set to only make $90,000 in '85. He got him to jump for $175,000 per year over four years and held Frontiere and the Rams off by arranging a separate deal to coax Mickey Sutton into signing with LA. Probably needlessly, the Invaders ran a psychological operation that tormented Sutton enough to want to take the Rams offer--soap in his Squincher, sugar in the gas tank, uni an inch too tight, stuff like that.

It didn't stop there: territorial picks were conducted by fax with the results sent over to ESPN, which let Killdeer forge documents that gave Oakland rights to Washington and Washington State. This let him pursue high projected picks Joe Kelly and Rueben Mayes, both of whom signed quickly--Kelly was stalked by a PI hired by Paul Brown. Mayes dreaded the idea of playing in the deep south, as Tampa and Atlanta both called him in for multiple pre-draft interviews. The Invaders also added Junior Tautalatasi, completely re-working the run game. Taube stressed out over the secret, "real" ledgers, but Oakland had a chance to be a fun team for a patient, committed fanbase. Cletis even found Taube some investors in the scion of a local pistachio family currently conducting a private, low-level guerilla war in Iran, the only other producers of the green nut. The youngest of five boys, the Fifth Son "needed something to do" after participating in the SLA in the 70s; the 15% acquisition of the Invaders was a way to keep tabs. 

For all his exuberant operations, Killdeer's final move seemed to come out of Ancient Greek concepts of Love from Strength: when it was clear Tom Newton's knee injury in the Wild Card effectively ended his career, Killdeer hooked him up with Cuban doctors; when it proved too serious to restore, Cletis cut him a check for $200,000, what would've been the fullback's '86 salary with all the performance based bonuses.