USFL Fragments: '88, Black Swan in Sun City

Fear of the Black Swan subsided by January, even though the country contracted--didn't look great next to Soviet Reconstruction, didn't look great next to the Rust Belt who, taking in "Red'' investment overtly and covertly started, showing signs of pushback to neo-yeomanism and financialization. Bulls fans' worries of a Stallion collapse/coup were papered over by owner Jim Bullard's "diverse" congress of Barons--land holding capital--sharing liquidity, credit ache, and continued financial success: they remained league leaders in attendance despite measured ticket hikes and deep June heat. Wes Chandler's arrival in mid-January after a disappointing '87 conjured memories of his Gainsville days. Lars Tate soothed the Bulldogs faction of fans--they always seemed to balance better than Birmingham in this regard. Rewards could be reaped by the teams' low-risk investments in small college talent in '86 and '87. Greg Lloyd and Jesse Tuggle looked healthy and superhuman in training camp. 

It almost made everyone forget their new head coach was a CFL vet pushing 60. Long time Toronto Argonauts frontman Leo Cahill accepted the position of GM/Head Coach from team president Larry Csonka after a brief flirtation with social and aesthetic progress, interviewing New Orleans assistant Johnnie Walton. The Cahill hire seemed bizarre; the running gag being he came to stake out a condo for retirement. He was cheap. 

Kerwin Bell existed in the minds of Bulls fans as a sort of Gleaming Knight On a Hill, and after an excellent fall became the answer to the Quarterback Question--the one query the club had failed to answer. There was a split within the organization: Bullard waffled--he would be good for the press--but the Barons were in a fervor for the Gator. 

Csonka and Cahill were weary. His agent's contract demands healed the cleave: 4 years, $2.5 million seemed absurd. It seemed a calculated gamble: Tom Tupa and Stan Humphries, the two biggest minnows of the QB class, had chosen Spring; Don Shula himself worked Bell out. The allure of a League finally opening the wallet for rookies--and a demand for young pivots--meant Kerwin possibly had leverage, especially with the hometown club. Saddled with the second highest payroll in the league thanks to the Rozier gamble the year before, Jacksonville walked. This infuriated Baron Alphonsus Dupree Beauregard, Northern Florida's video rental kingpin and owner of the highest rated non-affiliate station in Sun City. In hopes of forcing some sort of negotiation, "Dupey" signed Bell to an endorsement deal worth $300,000 and had him wear a mock jersey in the Bulls' signature silver, garnett, and orange. 

No avail! After careful evaluation of the quarterback situation, Cahill's decision to reorient the offense around Tracy Ham perplexed the suburban fanbase. An option quarterback at Georgia Southern with legs and an arm, Lindy Infante had signed Ham with the vague guarantee he'd be able to at least compete for QB in '87. He instead spent the year making $56,000 to impersonate Doug Flutie in practice. With Turk Schonert and Kent Austin the other options, Cahill--a CFL coach who could never win the Grey Cup but who could build a competitive team quickly--decided to give Ham a shot. He let James Pruitt and Ray Alexander walk into the sunset, and reset the offense to a 3 receiver, single back spread. Twelve-a-side habit, sure, but Cahill sighted striking similarities between the Bulls and the Generals, the reigning champs. Both clubs had power backs, seasoned receivers, and strong lines. They also had very smart quarterbacks who could run if needed. Ham should get a shot he thought: opposing defenses often targeted Rozier because they knew Turk and Kent got the yips. Having a scrambler could open pass plays or create new opportunities. This–along with what he felt was the best defense in the league–justified Cahill's experimentation. That didn't placate racist factions of both ownership and the ticket base.

Now they had this "little Black Hole at the center of my universe," Beauregard fumed. He seriously considered divestiture before a hostile takeover attempt by Blockbuster consumed his time. "Gonna be another weird-ass year," quipped Baron Bubba Blakely, who was reaping profits in the exotic animal market before being assassinated by a man dressed in a Lion suit who had been sitting in a cage for weeks.

(note for this new edition: we feel that we should address Kerwin Bell’s saga, though it occurred after print: the Gator, projected as high as the 2nd round by Dr. Z, would go to Miami in the 9th--after UVA’s Scott Seclues; the Fish offered no contract, but only an invite; Bullard and Csonka dodged calls; the Bandits, looking for leverage over Calabria heading into a contract year in ‘89, would acquire Kerwin’s rights for draft picks--he’d take a 3 year offer for $375,000, with a $125,000 bonus; Spurrier stuck him third behind Even Steven and fellow rookie Danny McManus--ed.).